• "It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper." - Jerry Seinfeld Tweet
• "Sometimes I feel like there are people just waiting for me to fall. The funny thing is, I can't give them anything. I have just never been a partier, even in school." - Jordin Sparks Tweet
• "Jim Carrey, a comic genius, has a harder time overcoming the public's desire for him to be funny simply because he's so good at it." - Ben Stiller Tweet
• "I wanted to be that quirky girl who writes funny songs that still have meaning." - Katy Perry Tweet
• "I love New York. I was sad, depressed and incredibly moved by our fellow countrymen and what they've done. I wanted to give people a chance to see something funny, have a distraction." - Ben Stiller Tweet
• "One of the funny things about the stock market is that every time one person buys, another sells, and both think they are astute." - William Feather Tweet
• "I had an idea of what I thought was funny. It's kind of based on how I am." - Jennifer Aniston Tweet
• "I don't really necessarily think I'm a funny guy, but I like the opportunity to take on something that I don't feel I'm the best at doing." - Seann William Scott Tweet
• "If you want to be thought a liar, always tell the truth." - Logan P. Smith Tweet
• "For a culture that has such a problem with death, we seem to deal with it in a quite bizarre way. We see people shot, killed and blown up, and we find it funny and sexy and all those things. But, the reality of it is that every day people die, and people are really sad and they grieve and they go through a really difficult process with it." - Michael Sheen Tweet